I don't go to too many black metal show and there are several reasons why, though I won't bore anyone with details. I can appreciate some of the artists and the music of this spirited genre, but there are much stronger, more potent, and "realisitic" types of metal out there that are far better. Last night I went to see these bands perform for the first time, and for better or worse, I was impressed by the turnout from the usual 500-1,000 metalheads I always see at shows in town who will see ANY show provided that it has the word "metal" in it. Being that it was a black metal show, of course, there were the usual freaks with all the piercings and shit all over their already-ugly faces, the usual wannabe vampires, goth twerps, and industrial rejects were also in attendance, but also a lot of Hispanic and Latino folks who came from the same crowd as the Dimmu Borgir show last year.
The show was violent and crazy, with tons of sweaty, greasy people pushing and shoving to see Cradle of Filth and Satyricon performing their brand of blasphemous darkness before the waiting crowd before them. At several times through their respective sets, my pin-striped fedora hat kept getting knocked off my head because of all the flying bodies being tossed around. I didn't expect to see, and literally feel, so much passion for these bands. I mean, I can understand for a legendary band to receive such adulation.... but Cradle of Filth? Satyricon? Hardly legendary! Are we that enamored by evil and Satan and the almighty blackness that we will line up around the corner all the way down to 45th and 46th St. just to see a midget from the UK lead a band of fellow ragamuffin dressed like rejects from Transylvania or two dudes from Norway (Satyr and Frost of Satyricon) who look like they're dressed and ready for a gay fashion show? Well, the meatheads... I mean, metalheads... seem to enjoy them. But much like 80s Glam, these guys are nothing more than posers dressed in black. Did they play well? Some of them did. Was I entertained? There were moments. But following on my diatribe of Eurotrash metal, there was plenty of it to be shared and last night's show proves that our (American) interests now lie with anything remotely European, no matter how lame and contrived they may be.
SEPTIC FLESH - The only band that really kept some semblance of anything remotely metal and they built on the strength of their musical quality. These death metallers, from Athens, Greece, had the difficult task of opening the show. Lucky for them, and perhaps because of their earlier endeavors into metal before splitting in 2003, they played a pretty brutal set that got mosh-pits started and the bodies flying right into the waiting arms of the surly security guards. They released a new album called Communion, which came out last year, and played a couple songs from it. Many people in the crowd seemed to have listened to the album a few times as they were yelling out title tracks and singing along in unison. Whenever singer/bassist Spiros "Seth" Antoniou lifted his instrument up, the crowd went nuts. At times, drummer Fotis Benardo would stand and point a stick at the crowd and they were on their feet. It was apparent that the crowd was on their side and we were witnessing the a pretty decent band coming back into their own again. A good mix of brutality and musicianship elevates this band as the "best opening metal band" that I've seen in a long time. Set Rating: B
SATYRICON - My knowledge of this band could fit a thimble. As with so-called "Norwegian black metal" bands, I expected to see some really evil shit when this band took the stage. From what I had seen in their videos, these guys meant business and I expected blood, fire, pentagrams, and baphomet goats hanging everywhere... but, of course, this wasn't a Gorgoroth show! So instead, the only thing remotely "evil" on stage was the mic stand encased in a wooden riser resembling a devil's pitchfork. When frontman Satyr took the stage, looking like he just came from a industry party or a fashion show, with his hair slicked back in brilliantine and dressed in tight black pants, which prominently showed off his bulge, and all black metal credibility went right out the window. At times, the dude even smiled! No one smiles in black metal! But I have to give him props as a frontman, the man can command the crowd and he seems to enjoy making them rally behind his cries as he tosses one choral part after another. Frost, the drummer, was a fucking animal - think Tommy Lee but with the zombified face of Mick Mars - as he continuously battered his drum kit like it owned him money. He was fun to watch! I wished there was more to go on, but Satyricon seem like their pretty comfortable to play it safe or at least not go far enough. Satyr, who I believe to be the brains behind the band, likes to prowl around on stage, playing a cross between Rob Halford and David Bowie, slithering yet maintaining at least one foot on a monitor to show off his dominance. Decent set, but hardly what I'd call "evil". Set Rating: B-
CRADLE OF FILTH - Much like Satyricon, these guys are about scary as Halloween costume. Even when they bring out a mic stand with skeletal remains wrapped around it, there is nothing remotely black or metal for this set. What is scary is that throughout the hour-and-a-half set, I nearly get decapitated by flying limbs coming down on my neck and almost getting crushed by charged-up maniacs against the barricades. (Such is the risk for being a fan of metal.) Fighting off dudes trying to squeeze between you and the other person next to you was tougher than whatever Cradle of Filth threw at the crowd. I'm not too familiar with them either other than people either casually like them or really hate them and that frontman Dani Filth has appeared on Bam Margera's now-defunct TV show Viva La Bam. Dani is not as good a frontman as Satyr, but for all his 4'6 height, he commands the crowd's attention as he croons along with keyboardist Rosie Smith and literally screams like a little girl, which is apparently a trademark of his, to open every song. The others in the band play well, though no one really takes a moment to shine and really strut their stuff, relying on Dani's theatrics to carry them until the very last song. I wouldn't call them lazy, but their lack of commitment pretty much sums up their respective places within the band. Set Rating: B
AFTER THE SHOW - I got to meet Mike Gitter, Roadrunner's A&R man, face-to-face for the first time and found him to be an interesting fellow. A bit guarded but still cordial enough to extend a hand and allow a brief chat between us. Underneath his Hugo Boss attire and businessman exterior, he strikes me as a man who still has a bit of the old fanboy within him, even if the years as a suit has made him a bit soft, as he prefers VIP treatment over sweating it out amongst the other metalheads like I do, and that anyone who wants to be in the music business can learn a lot from him. When we discuss about his past as a magazine writer, I can't help but notice that a part of him wishes he could do it again as he continually casts his eyes downward, remembering those years when his hair was long and he was a reckless kid who spent mommy's money going to shows. He is definitely someone who can tell me the ins and outs of writing for metal. And while he may come off as a bit of the jaded suit, there is a nice guy in there who could be a fine mentor for the right person willing to learn.
ASSHOLE OF THE EVENING
I finally witnessed a band member acting every bit the arrogant, scum-sucking, piece of Eurotrash that I expected to meet. With the lame excuse of "eating dinner" - which was only a fucking pizza crust! - he refused to take photographs or sign pictures for any fan who would ask, yet waiting by the bus for all to see him as he chatted away with pale, malnourished roadie. This douchebag in question is Dave Pybus, bassist for Cradle of Filth. He flat out told me and others around that "I don't care if I'm being an asshole. I'm eating dinner. If I take a picture with you, then I have to take one with him, and him, and then everyone. Write on the internet that I'm an asshole." And that's just what I'm doing. As someone who hates this kind of shitty, rude behavior, I called his broke, limey ass out in front of everyone there. People who paid $25-$27 to see this jackass performing, rather sloppily mind you, and yet he's going to tell us that he doesn't care about the same fans who buy their shitty merch so he can snack on that pizza crust? FUCK HIM! I told Pybus that he was trash and that he deserves to choke on his pizza crust for denying his fans like that! Then, as if to rationalize his decision, he tells me that he's just a "hired gun" and that Dani "takes all the money anyway" so he couldn't care less. Again, I fired back with more insults about his character and his music-playing and he immediately went inside the bus and stayed there. GOOD! Pybus is a talentless scumbag and he knows it. I wouldn't be surprised if he's done this before to other fans but this was definitely the first time anyone's called his ass out. I think all bands and musicians should appreciate fans for paying to see them put on a show, even one as lousy as last night's. Though, to be perfectly honest, it felt great putting that limey cocksucker in his place.... even if the band is signed to Roadrunner.
Ran into Anthrax guitarist and resident cavman Rob Caggiano, who had seen the show and is apparently friends with Gitter.... at least on MySpace. Caggiano was a bit weird, but given my recent history with Anthrax, I'm not really surprised or bothered by his behavior. His loss!
And I got to hang out with the guys of Septic Flesh who were super cool, especially Fotis and Seth. Satyr looked creepy in person and Frost was even creepier, but both were friendly and good enough to take pictures for fans. Dani was the only one, other than Rosie, to take pictures and sign autographs for fans. But I have to say that the other remaining members of CoF, Paul Allender and Martin Skaroupka, are douchebags for promising to come back out and then remaining on the bus and not coming back out. While I understand they're tired or whatever, don't promise fans that you'll be right out and then be a fucking asshole and stay on the bus. In truth, I couldn't give a rat's ass about any of the members of CoF, except that they - or at least Dani, but quite marginally - give me some metal credibility. I didn't know who any of them were and don't really care. (Of course, if you've seen my collage of me and metal bands, you know that I'm quite the collector!)
CONCLUSION
And so wraps another show. Neither scary, evil or dark, but lame, cartoonish, and otherwise a bit pointless. Though I have to give props to Septic Flesh for coming out as the opening band and kicking some fucking ass! See you guys later this year.
Show Rating: B-
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