Metalliblog: Arch Enemy (w/ Exodus, Arsis & Mutiny Within) @ Nokia Theatre

For those of you who don't know, I nearly got into a fight with that fugly, Ginger-looking freak Michael Amott of Arch Enemy. The guy acted like a fucking turd and was about to pull the diva routine again (the first time being at the Carcass reunion show back in 2008 at the same venue, no less) by refusing to sign autographs or take pics with fans until I stepped in and called him a "douchebag." Incensed by this, he drops his bags, turns around, and actually confronts me by putting his hands on me. Witnessed by dozens of fans from the show, I told Amott to get his filthy, Euro-trash hands off me before it would go down badly. My plan worked as Amott returned to his bus, dropped of his bags, and eventually came back out to meet the group of fans waiting outside. Looking back, I should have laid Amott out for putting his Albino fingers on me, but why ruin an almost great night dominated by the great Exodus, who absolutely destroyed Arch Enemy.

The night opened fairly well with Mutiny Within, who took their melodic death growls to familiar heights and seemed to go over well with the crowd. At times, the singer and bassist seemed to connect with two douchers in the front row who were headbanging in delight at the junior-leaguers' attempt at being heavy. But Mutiny Within remind me of why certain bands never reach that next plateau. They're not strong enough to go that extra mile.

Arsis, however, came out swinging. After frontman James Malone's troubles with bulimia and numerous cancellations which cost Arsis much exposure, the new team come out quite confident and assure in themselves that their music is the real deal. Malone's constantly eyes the front row to make sure that everyone is having a good time. It isn't until "We Are the Nightmare" that business really picks up.

But that business belongs to Exodus, the obvious stars of the night, though surprisingly not the headliners. For the second consecutive time, the Bay Area thrashers play second fiddle to a foreign headliner (the first being Kreator last year), yet manage to come out as the favorite band of the evening. With all the flying bodies and walls of death surrounding the venue, there was no question that Exodus were at the top of their game. The members of the band connected with the front row, and myself, and we all became one happy family as the band charged through open "Bonded by Blood," chanted through the chorus of "Children of a Worthless God" and closing out with "Toxic Waltz." Frontman Dukes and I even shared a moment at the end of the set, full of sweaty embraces and laughter.

The members of Arch Enemy take their positions to the soundtrack of some conqueror's theme, befitting of some past European war hundreds of years ago, but the presentation is not. Rather than some ravenous she-beast, frontwoman Angela Gossow comes off more like a mildly angry child throwing a tantrum while turning on all the closeted dykes in the crowd. Sure, her growls are fierce and she deserves some measure of respect, but her chest-thumping like a man (careful she doesn't pop an implant) and schmaltzy speeches to the crowd is laughable and awkward. Bands should just shit the fuck up and play, not give speeches.

MUTINY WITHIN - Junior leaguers who want to play with the big boys. With a name like that, you won't get far! Just ask Dirge Within. Set Grade: C+

ARSIS - Lots of tricky fretboarding and noodling heralds a welcome return to a pretty good band that came dangerously close to ending. Set Grade: B

EXODUS - What can be said? The old masters of metal, and frontman Rob Dukes, make an example clear: If it ain't broke, why fix it? Set Grade: B+

ARCH ENEMY - The so-called "Diva Satanica" and the Swedish meatballs who act as her backup band seem to have bitten off more then they can chew by having to follow the footsteps of Exodus. Set Grade: B

Michael Amott is a cunt and fucking loser, and I wish cancer on him! If you want to piss him off, call him a "douchebag" and prepare to throw down. Just sayin'.... And what the fuck is up with Rob Dukes skipping out like that while the other members of Exodus take the time to meet fans?

Show Grade: B